Forever family

There is no better support network than family. I’m exceptionally lucky to have very supportive future in-laws as well as my own family too.

Pregnancy is the perfect time to build bridges with family and friends. Your priorities change and you have to put your children and future children first.

Not everyone is fortunate to have help from family. Whether you feel hatred or resentment, you need to give people the chance to be a part of your children’s life. They can make their own choices when they’re older.

I was 19 when I was told I had two older half sisters, who also had children of their own. I became an auntie to three boys in the blink of an eye. I was full of mixed emotions. Upset that I wasn’t told before, but now I’m a mother myself, I understand that all you want to do is protect your children.

 [Rachael, Me, Nicola. My half sisters]

It also showed me that blood doesn’t always make you family. The man that I call dad, the man that has brought me up, isn’t related by blood. Instead he chose to be my daddy when I was just a tiny baby, when he didn’t have to. 

Growing up, I was a nightmare from what I can remember. Writing in books ‘I want my real daddy’. I was a broken child. I truly believe my childhood is the main contributor to my depression and my post natal depression. I’ll go into more detail about dealing with a mental illness another time.

After everything, my family never once gave up on me, even though I was (and still am) hard work. Yes there are times I feel like I am treated differently, others notice it, sometimes it’s just paranoia.

 [Alex, Ashlee, me. My younger brother and sister]

Being a mummy, I have learnt first hand how difficult and challenging it is to bring children up. And Colby isn’t even two yet! It’s mentally draining and some days you just want to scream and cry.

So I want to openly say, I’m sorry Mum and Dad for being the horrible brat I was while growing up. I do appreciate what you do for me and my own family.

 [Dad, me, Mum]

Like any relationship, there is always going to be some form of conflict with your partners family at some point. For me it was with Dane’s sisters. At the time I was struggling and felt everyone was against me, but when in fact they were only trying to help. It’s quite common for people to fall out a lot, but when children are concerned you need to put petty issues aside. My children come first and I soon realised I had been acting immature and irresponsible. It took me all my courage but I wrote a message apologising. Things have been so much better since, I feel more comfortable and there doesn’t seem to be an atmosphere. Danes sisters do a hell of a lot for us and the children. I’d be stupid to push them away.

 [Dane and his sisters, Carly (left) and Lia (right)]

Dane has been the turning point in my life, I couldn’t of chose anyone more perfect to start my own family with. With him I will have my ‘forever family’.

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